Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Randomize
