Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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