I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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