Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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