what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
