so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Randomize
