am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
