those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I think people are normalizing furries
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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