He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
