He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
