We won't sleep together?
Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
pray to the hookup gods
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
