I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
