The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
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