What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Randomize
