my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Randomize
