my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Randomize