Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.