lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO