i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
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I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
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I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.