I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
