Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
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