I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize