Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
