Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
