The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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