My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I'm too high and old for this...
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize