She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Randomize
