how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize
