your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
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