Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
you didnt know i had herpes?
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
you had me at cake vodka
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
