i already hear my dad disowning me
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
Randomize
