I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Randomize
