Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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