That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Randomize