i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
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