You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
