I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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