I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
