don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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