he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
