i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
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