super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
