He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
