My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
