How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
