ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
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