There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
