he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
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