Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
