They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.