dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Randomize
