I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Randomize
