Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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